If you adhere to a given set of beliefs which have been organised into what is called "a religion", it is fairly easy to convey to others where you stand in spiritual matters. For example, if you tell someone "I'm an Anglican" or "I'm a Catholic" or "I'm a Buddhist", they will instantly have a fairly good idea of your belief system. It would take a bit more questioning to find out your spiritual idiosyncracies or what kind of Anglican or whatever you were.
When you are on an individual spiritual journal which is free of beliefs and which moves and changes every day, it becomes much harder to explain where you have come from and where you are now in your spiritual life. My "religion" has nothing to offer another person except the truth as I see it. But a truth communicated to another person always becomes mere second hand knowledge, which is of limited value to them. Of necessity, therefore, it is a private journey.
In any case, I find that most people aren't interested in my "way" as it offers no promises, no security, no conveyable answers to the big picture, absolutely nothing except, for me, a wonderful feeling of integrity. I live happily with the unknown and have no desire to "fill in the gaps" prematurely.
Organised religion, or any form of belief for that matter, tries to turn the unknown into the known by filling in the gaps with belief and faith. To me, this is like a child colouring in by numbers. A picture will emerge, but it sure ain't art.
Real art comes into being through a clear seeing and a movement of the creative spirit. In the meantime, living with a blank canvas is an authentic thing to do.
In my experience, most people seem more interested in security blankets than spiritual maturity. I remember one young man, dependent on alcohol and drugs, telling me that I was "spiritually desolate" as I didn't "represent" anything. I suspect that it was the desolation in his own soul that he was feeling and I wonder if he realised what he was actually saying when he used the word "re-present" - a re-hashing of someone else's ideas.
He was so upset by my lack of a belief system that he became physically violent, but I managed to herd him out the door and lock it before he started smashing my louvres and throwing things at me through the gap, while threatening to kill me. He calmed down after a little while and picked up the broken bits of glass very carefully. I had no more trouble from him except for stealing some of my food and trying to scare me with his pale, laughable attempts at black magic. This story is indicative of a sometimes hostile reaction to my lack of a belief system, although this was the only time I was physically threatened.
(continued in PART 2)
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