"Let's see what's on the board today, Norm."
"I've left me glasses at home, Frank. Can you read some of them out to me?"
"Orright, Norm. Here's a good one:
WANTED - MESSIAH
Applicant must be able to heal the sick, raise the dead and reduce ear wax in the elderly."
"How the hell do you reduce earwax?"
"Let me finish ...
Equal opportunity but must have own beard and sandals.
A limited number of disciples and other hangers-on can be provided on request."
"Does that mean I'd have a religion named after me?"
"No, but you get four weeks unpaid leave a year."
"What's the pay like?"
"Says here you'd be working for love!!!"
"Anything else there I'm qualified for?"
"Yeah, here's another one:
PART-TIME HOUSEKEEPER/NUCLEAR PHYSICIST
You still got that old particle accelerator in the shed, Norm? It could double as a vacuum cleaner."
"No, sold it at the flea market a while back. Anyhow, I'm done with sucking up other people's black holes for a pittance. Can't you find anything other than dead-end jobs?"
"How about dogwalker?"
"Yeah, yeah, now you're talking. Take down the number."
"Let's have a look at the free DIY courses on offer. Hey, ‘Build your own Universe using Scrap Metal’ sounds good."